Couples and marriage
Counseling after an affair
True North Vitality offers affair recovery counseling for couples in Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania, at offices in Greensburg and Ligonier and by secure video. Licensed counselor Dave Kemerer helps couples after infidelity or betrayal to steady the crisis, understand what happened, and decide whether and how to rebuild trust, with faith included only on request.
- 3 Pennsylvania Licensed Professional Counselors
- Greensburg · Irwin · Ligonier
- Online across Pennsylvania
- Christ-centered counseling
This may help if
- You have just discovered an affair and feel shaken to the core.
- You had an affair and want to take responsibility and repair what you can.
- The affair was emotional or online, and it still feels like a betrayal.
- It happened years ago, but it keeps coming back in arguments.
- You do not know yet whether you want to stay together.
Can a marriage recover after an affair?
Some couples rebuild after infidelity and some decide to part. Counseling cannot promise either outcome, but it can give both of you a steady place to work through the betrayal and make a clear, informed decision about the future rather than one made in the first days of shock.
An affair can involve physical or emotional infidelity, hidden messages or long patterns of lying. Whatever form it took, the work starts the same way: slowing things down, getting honest, and making room for the hurt partner to be heard.
Why does it hurt this much?
Finding out about an affair can feel like a trauma. Counselors who work with infidelity describe reactions such as replaying the details, flashbacks, being on high alert for signs of more lying, avoiding reminders, trouble sleeping, mood swings and low mood. These reactions are common and they are not a sign that something is wrong with you.
The partner who had the affair often carries guilt, shame or confusion of their own. Both experiences belong in the room, and the counselor makes space for each partner to speak and be heard. If sleep, mood or daily life are badly affected, talk with your doctor as well, and see trauma therapy for individual support.
What does affair recovery counseling involve?
- Steadying the crisisThe first sessions focus on safety, sleep, daily routines and how to talk about the affair without making things worse.
- Getting the storyWith the counselor's guidance, the partner who had the affair answers questions honestly. Openness, rather than hiding, is what makes repair possible.
- Acknowledging the impactThe hurt partner is heard, and the partner who had the affair learns to respond to that hurt rather than defend against it.
- Choosing a pathTogether you look at what led up to the affair and decide whether to rebuild, and if so, what new agreements and plan you need. If you separate, the work can help you move forward without the betrayal defining the rest of your life.
Who provides it, and where?
Dave Kemerer, MA, LPC, founder of True North Vitality, specializes in couples, marriage and family work. He has been in the helping profession since 2008, was licensed in 2016 and is trained in the Gottman Method. Dave sees couples at the Greensburg office on Alwine Avenue and the Ligonier office just off the Diamond, and online. Read more on Dave's page or see the Greensburg office.
Online sessions are by secure video through SimplePractice for clients located in Pennsylvania at the time of each session. Couples who want each partner to have their own counselor along with joint sessions can ask about Dynamic Couples Therapy. For Christian couples, prayer or Scripture can be included when both partners ask for it.
What about insurance and getting started?
Many plans do not cover couples counseling unless a diagnosis applies to one partner, so ask us before you begin. Some of our counselors work with insurance and others are self-pay. See insurance and payment.
To start, book a free 20-minute consultation by phone, email or the contact form. Either partner can make the first call. Paperwork is completed before the first session. Sessions are 55 minutes, and weekly sessions are encouraged for the first month when possible.
When is couples work not the right step?
Couples sessions are not the right fit when there is abuse or when one partner is afraid of the other, including threats or controlling behavior after an affair comes out. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. True North Vitality is not an emergency service. If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988 or call 911.
Common questions
Does the affair have to be over before we start?
Whether the affair has ended matters a great deal for couples work, and the counselor will ask about it early on and talk with you about what it means for the plan. If one of you is unsure, you can still call. The consultation is a good place to talk through where things stand and what the first step should be.
How much detail should be shared about the affair?
This is one of the hardest questions couples face, and there is no single answer that fits every couple. Honesty matters, and so does timing. In sessions, the counselor helps you decide what questions matter most to the hurt partner, and how to answer them honestly without adding needless pain. It is worked out together, not all at once.
Can I come on my own?
Yes. Some people start with individual counseling, either because their partner is not ready or because they need to sort out their own feelings first. Talk about what you need during the free 20-minute consultation and the counselor will suggest whether individual or couples sessions make sense to begin with.
How long does recovery take?
There is no set timeline. Triggers and painful reminders are a common part of recovery, and they can show up at unexpected times. Counseling moves at a pace both partners can manage. The counselor will review progress with you and adjust the plan as you go.
References
Published by True North Vitality, a counseling practice of Pennsylvania Licensed Professional Counselors in Westmoreland County. Last updated November 2, 2026. This page is general information, not medical or mental health advice, a diagnosis or a substitute for care.
You might also be looking for
- Couples and marriage counselingHelp with communication, conflict and trust for couples, in Greensburg, Irwin, Ligonier and online.Learn more
- Christian marriage counselingMarriage counseling that helps couples build their marriage on Christ.Learn more
- Dynamic Couples TherapyEach partner has their own counselor, and both counselors meet with the couple together.Learn more
Ready to take the first step?
Call, email or send a short message to book a free 20-minute consultation. We’ll help you choose a counselor and an office in Greensburg, Irwin or Ligonier, or meet online anywhere in Pennsylvania.