Part 1 of our “Holiday Mental Health” Blog Series

Ready or not, it’s coming. The holidays.

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, connection, and warmth—but for many, it also brings stress, overstimulation, and complicated family dynamics. If you're already feeling a mix of anticipation and anxiety as the season approaches, you're not alone.

This blog kicks off our new series focused on mental health and emotional preparation for the holidays. Over the coming weeks, we’ll explore practical tools for managing expectations, grief, overstimulation, and more—so you can move through the season with greater peace and authenticity.

We begin with one of the most important and most challenging aspects of mental health during the holidays: setting emotional boundaries without guilt.

Why Setting Boundaries Matters (Especially Now)

Holidays can bring out the best—and sometimes the worst—in relationships. Maybe you’re anticipating a family member’s unsolicited opinions, pressure to attend every gathering, or guilt-tripping when you say no. Without healthy boundaries, we’re more likely to feel resentful, drained, or emotionally reactive.

Setting boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s a form of self-respect and relationship care.

When done with compassion and clarity, boundaries can actually improve connection by reducing conflict and resentment.

3 Common Guilt Traps (and How to Step Out of Them)

1. “If I don’t go, I’ll disappoint everyone.”

💭 Challenge this: Your absence might cause temporary discomfort, but your presence at the cost of your well-being is a much higher price. You’re allowed to prioritize rest and peace.

2. “They’ve always done so much for me—I owe them.”

💭 Challenge this: Gratitude doesn’t mean self-abandonment. You can appreciate others’ efforts and still have the right to decline something that doesn’t serve you.

3. “They’ll think I don’t care.”

💭 Challenge this: You can care deeply and still have limits. Clear, kind communication can actually reinforce how much you value the relationship.

Scripts for Saying “No” Without Over-Explaining

Sometimes, we feel the need to justify or soften our boundaries with long explanations. But you don’t have to provide a PowerPoint presentation for every “no.” Here are some simple scripts that honor both honesty and kindness:

“Thank you for the invite—this year, I need to keep things low-key, so I won’t be attending. I hope it’s a great time!”
“That sounds fun, but I’ve committed to some downtime that day.”
“I’m not up for that this year, but I really appreciate the thought.”
“I’ll be stopping by for a bit, but I’ll need to leave early to take care of myself.”

You can adjust these scripts to your tone, but the key is to stay grounded, brief, and firm—without falling into over-apology mode.

When It’s Okay to Leave Early—or Not Go at All

Some signs that skipping or shortening an event is the healthiest option for you:

You feel physically ill or anxious at the thought of going
You know being there will likely lead to emotional harm
You're recovering from grief, trauma, or burnout
You’re attending only out of obligation or fear

Remember: just because something is tradition doesn’t mean it’s still serving you. You have the right to reassess what works for this season of your life.

Bonus: Download Your Free “Holiday Boundaries Worksheet”

Want to prepare in a tangible way? We've created a free Holiday Boundaries Worksheet to help you identify your values, set limits, and plan supportive responses ahead of time.

Download Holiday Boundaries Worksheet

Stay Tuned for More Holiday Mental Health Support

This post is the first in our multi-part Holiday Mental Health Series, covering topics like:

Check back to follow the series!